Social Skills

A: Do you know the new neighbor that moved in a week ago?

B: Um…do you mean the handsome guy that live in the third floor?

A: Yeah, it’s him!! He’s so cute! What’s his name?

C: He’s name is Eric. I’ve talked with him yesterday. But he’s quite of quiet and he
    seldom talk with people; it makes me feel that he’s not friendly.

B: But he has a dog for pet. I think people who love animals could not be an
    unfriendly guy. Maybe he is a shy person and he gets so nervous that he doesn’t
    talk too much or he’s a person who can’t express himself clearly.

A: I’ve seen an article which talks about different personalities before. It discussed
    several characteristics of people, such as bossy, optimistic, thoughtful, bashful…
    and so on. Perhaps he is a bashful person.

C: Oh, I’ve seen that article two days ago. It’s a very interesting report.

B: Really? What’s the content exactly about?

C: For example, bossy people would tend to lead. And most of their friends are
    people who don’t have much thinking; they are easy to compromise with
    everything.

A: Bossy people like to make decisions for others and they don’t know when to
    stop as they start. Therefore, they don’t have many friends.

B: I agree. Bossy people often want to control other people. They seldom think in
    others’ shoes. I don’t like that kind of person. By the way, what about the rest
    of personalities?

C: Optimistic people. Speaking of them, most of us may think that they don’t worry
    about anything. However, they are just like us would care about bad things. The
    only difference between us is that they would think much more optimistic than
    we do.

A: When we are feeling sad or depressed, optimistic people can encourage us and
    give us nerve. Chatting with them could give you a comfortable feeling. And
    that’s why they’re welcomed wherever they go.

B: The commonest byword they said is tomorrow will be better.

C: Yeah, I can’t agree more.

A: Third, thoughtful people. They tend to carefully considering the affect of their
    actions or caring toward other people and always put others’ thinking at first
    place.

C: Thus, they’re also easy to get hurt. Because they are very sensitive, they easily
    mind about popular apprehension to them. So we have to treat them cautiously.

B: My friend, Anna, belongs to this kind of people. Although getting along with her
    isn’t very easy, nevertheless, she’s still my best friend.

A: Last, bashful people. They are introvert when they first meet strangers. But
    once they are familiar with you, they’ll let you know the real him or her.

C: One characteristic of bashful people is that they don’t talk too much. They often
    do things more than what they talk. As the result, sometimes we might
    misunderstand their behaviors. In addition, they are good listeners in groups.

B: Wow, I see. So that’s the reason why A would think our new neighbor, Eric,
    belongs to bashful people, right?

A: Exactly!!

C: Um…Perhaps you’re right. But if Eric really is a bashful person, then how could
    we make friends with him?

B: Well, It’s my show time!! I’ve taken a class which is teaching people how to
    make friends with strangers these days. Maybe I can show you some tips for
    making friends and improving your social skills.

A: That’s interesting. I am not good at talking with strangers. Maybe I should learn
    some skills.

C: That’s just helping me make friends with Eric. And I don’t want to
    misunderstand him.

B: OK. The first thing is we should change our mindset. Don’t wait someone talk to
    you. We can take active way to express our benevolence to a stranger. And
    remember to remain relaxed, if you are too nervous, it will be more difficult to
    build rapport with others.

C: To relax can avoid stammering. Let others easily understand what we are
    talking about.

A: Sounds difficult. Talking with strangers let me feel strange. It still less get rid of
    nervous to face them.

C: Therefore, you should practice more; you will get accustomed.

B: C is right. The next one, talk about others’ situation. Make them feel interested.

    And let him know you are listening. Then feed back what you’ve heard and refer
    back to others’ comments later on. When you talk or listen to others, the eye
    contact and attentiveness is important.

A: I have similar experience. Some people only talk themselves, and then I don’t
    have patience to listen. It makes me so bored.

C: I think eye contact is necessary. One of my friends has a bad habit. When I talk
    to him, he doesn’t look at my eyes, and it let me feels I am not respected and I
    am ignored. Although I know he is listening, I still feel uncomfortable.

B: So we should take care of this: to see things through other people’s eye.
    Observe what others need. For instant, when you eat lunch, after finish you can
    give napkins to others, this will make people feel you are cozy and thoughtful.
    And treat others with polite, respect and so on. Or smile at everyone to be
    friendly.

A: Everyone should learn these skills. That will be helpful in your life.

B: The last one is expressing how we feel and think. The interaction would get us
    to know each other. Making friends with others is not so difficult. But the shy
    people have to spend longer time to practice.

C: Now we can visit our new neighbor, Eric, to show our favor to him. And tell him
    the social skills. I hope he would be loquacious.

A: Um…, I wouldn’t do it. I will feel embarrassed and I have no idea what to say to
    him.

B: Hey, try and practice. And we will go with you, don’t be afraid.

A: OK. I will try. Should we bring some gift for him?

B&C: Wow. You learn so fast. That’s great.

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